New Year's Resolutions

We've discussed my resolutions so let us now discuss yours. But first, if you'll excuse the expletive, put some fucking clothes on! Yeah, I know, this is the year you are going to shape up, lose that baby fat that's been clinging to your for, well, your entire life. Kudos to you, you will be happier and healthier and maybe some man will want to see you naked once you've become this new toned you. But you aren't her yet. And I sure as hell am not that man! Lotion up in a towel. Wrap the towel around your chest like a woman, which I assume you are be aus you've been hanging around the woman's locker room with your tits out with a towel around your waist. And as I dress as discreetly as Gumpossible why do you feel the needs to completely nude-up and slather your self up? This is not your home this is a locker room, you know, semi-public space without curtains and doors and the like. Cover up. I'm sure by now anyone who knows me or has read this blog is tired of my sort-of-homophobic anti-locker-room-exhibitionist rants. I know I am. So remember: if you can't stand to look at it in the mirror, don't make me look at it Which reminds me of a text message my former bossman sent me Sunday last. The context being the flamboyant man in the white spandex shorts, aided in its concealment efforts by an over the shorts thong. The texted expressed both shock and horror, not at the fact that this man was dressed in such an oddly outdated way but horror at how unfit the man's bum looked in his shorts. Spandex thong man, my previous expletive exclamation applies to you too.