A Thought on Mental Retardation

One of my problems has always been that I have a biting tongue, I talk out my ass, I don't think before I speak, whatever you please. The truth is as a child I got in trouble for lying, some scar has stuck with me. So here I am tell the truth and not sparing any one's feelings for better or worse. I know its mean, but I will not stop, I'm to set in my ways.

Today I kept my mouth shut. I had too, I'm living with 16 other people and if any only 1 or 2 were friends before this excursion. Its not a great time to be chomping on my feet. All I wanted to say was

"You are retarded."

thing was I didn't want to insult anyone who was born with any type of mental deficiency. (That sentence sounds mean too... I'm on a roll!)

Its not that this girl is actually stupid or deficient, she just acts like she is. Going on and on about the buttons on your shorts or feeling up her friends fuck buddy (which I'm not entirely sure is against the rules) and blurting out the dumbest fucking shit in class or in public. She prides herself in her ability to drink herself into oblivion and bitches about it the next day.

I just figured out why she bothers me.

The boys like her more than me.

And she has no chin. (which is worse?)

Walking in a Walking City

I'm sure I'll be amending my beliefs about this city at some point but at the moment it is new and exciting and I'm in love.

Walking around town is easy as pie, after the crust has been rolled out. The infrastructure is made for the pedestrian, look at the bridges, the sidewalks, the cross walks, the alleys.

All that is beside the point.

Walking in a walking city with a man who is a foot taller than you is like being the antelope chasing the cheetah, minus the backward predator-prey reference. I think you get it. His stroll is my gallop, his stride is 5 mine. Think short, think sore. For the love of Pete slow down gentle giant we'll keep up!

Coffee or Tea

Today, in the land of the tea, started to notice the obscene number of Starbucks just sitting around being abused. Starbucks is a sick sad statement about globalization, there is one on every corner brimming with latte lovers foregoing the stereotypical tea. I didn't cross the pond for this. I won't stand for the Americanization of the world.

I went three times today.

The Cheaper Flight

Today, yesterday I suppose, I made my first transatlantic flight. My destination: London.



As we all know air travel is not nearly as simple as that automobile travel which we Americans have come to rely on so heavily. No straight shots down the interstate or scenic views, just 39,000 feet in the sky on a bus hurtling toward the next port of call, being warned about upcoming bumps in Dutch, a language you definitely don't understand.



I chose Dutch, or rather Dutch chose me, on this little adventure for the price. I could have flown stop-free in English, my native tongue (on most days at least) and paid for the convince but I'm planning other adventures and am saving up, but I digress... flying Dutch was an experience, the plane was good the flight was nice, the guy next to me? whole other story.


Now it would be silly for me to fly a Dutch airline and not end up in Amsterdam, so I, for the sake of not looking silly landed in Amsterdam and waited. The funny thing about their airport is the security: you go through security at your gate. Fine, makes sense especially with connecting fliers, problem is they only open the gate an hour or so before your flight is scheduled to leave. I had a three and a half hour layover.


Have I mentioned I'm cheap?

I spent €3 on Internet but that's pretty outrageous so I sat on the floor. By the time I boarded my plane had black hands from my seat, very black (if you've ever seen me you know that anything past pink is amazing). I had grown used to the stick of "waste" as they call it Amsterdam (for another day: the many names of trash).


I mused while I dirtied my hands, why would the trash smell so foul? Why was the floor so grimey? I had been sitting on the floor at Dulles, it had been clean, and the US isn't known for its obsessive cleanliness as some places are.


Since this story ends in a city and it began in a clean airport I just want to know, why did the middle have to be filthy?

Gone So Long

Ok, I know, its bad, I'm lame.
Blame the jobs, count them 2.
Or blame the Internet, the shared computer the nice weather.
Blame what you please, but don't fret I think I'll keep up to date now.